Suzhou is for lovers

We've been in a water town about an hour from Shanghai for a few days.  Like so many cities in China, Suzhou seems on a map to be a quaint little spec but is, in fact, a city of 6 million people.  Its built over a series of canals and, incidentally, has a top notch Indian restaurant that we've been to twice.  I think its called the Venice of China or something along those lines....

Suzhou blends new and old, with an industrial park and Disney-scale amusement to the West, and ancient bridges and traditional housing in the center.  We've spent lots of time here and in the nearby water towns criss-crossing stone bridges, relaxing in gardens cultivated to within an inch of their lives, and strolling by the canals.  This town has been a shining example of old China, and we've had an awesome time.

Because entering and leaving the country ranges from inconvenient to impossible for the Chinese, there is a huge amount of intra-country tourism here.  When we get out of the main cities, we don't see many other Westerners, but the sights are often thronged with Chinese disembarking from tour buses and following a guide with a portable PA and brightly colored umbrella.  Zhuzhuang, a nearby water town, was the worst example since the Forbidden City.  It is walled off and therefore the masses are contained; the beautiful winding corridors along the canals home mainly to silk and chotchkes and a captive audience.  Between the tour guides yelling into their mikes (you're already amplified, folks, no need to scream), the masses queuing to cross a bridge or enter a temple, and every vendor shouting "lookalooka" as you pass, the serenity of the place is lost. 

What was so lovely about Suzhou was being able to experience life in a water town, without someone narrating it in Chinese on a loudspeaker.  There has also been a lot of women's weightlifting on CCTV late night, so bonus points.  Man, those girls are Beasts!

We leave for Hong Kong this afternoon on a 24 hour train ride.  We're going to lay in some supplies in Shanghai first and are currently charging every electronic device we have.  I foresee quite a few reruns of 30 Rock in my future...

Shopping in China

The style of salespeople in China is a little different to what we're accustomed to.  Basically, from the second we enter a store, an employee follows us like we're there to rob them blind.  If I pick up an item for further inspection, the helpful retailer will often start talking to me in Chinese and pick up another nearby item to show me.  I haven't yet determined if this second item is for comparative purposes, is higher priced, or is simply a staff pick.  Whatever the reason, we are too close to one another and I wish I could shop in peace.  The experience is confusing and we were finding ourselves getting a bit frustrated and claustrophobic.  Until I invented a game.

Basically, when we go into a shop (pharmacy, shoe, bookstore) the clerk usually goes right to Ed.  Given we're in China and he's the dude, he is obviously going to be the one making the purchasing decisions.  The whole surveillance and tracking system operates under the assumption that we won't split up.  So, as soon as a salesperson has glommed on to us, I veer off in my own direction (phase 1).  Now, the clerk has a critical decision to make, and the wheels are turning.  He is watching Ed, but has to keep looking away to get a fix on my location.  Am I behind the rack of sneakers? In the produce aisle? Does he stay with Ed or divert to tail me?  Who seems shiftier? 

8 out of 10 times, he calls for backup.  But by the time help arrives, I'm already in deep-browse mode.  The salesperson stands so close while I'm shopping that any unexpected move can and does cause collision, and this is where I really shine.  At this point, Ed is usually buying the thing we actually need: tissues, bottled water, a street map.  Which gives me time for phase 2, which is when I feign interest only in items on the shelves that are being blocked by the person following me.  Oh, excuse me, nope to your right, no now move left, no, right behind your head.  Oh, yes, so sorry, no I wanted that one by your foot.  Oh, how clumsy of me, yes, if you could just.  A little to your left, no my left.  My fault.  Yes this one.  No, not this one, that other one.  Sorry, if I could just reach around you...

Is this game mean spirited and culturally insensitive? Mmmm, probably.  Does it provide us a bit of amusement in situations that can seem tense? Sure.  Also?  Phase 2 frustrates and confuses the tailgate, who typically retreats and finally gives me room to breathe. Works. Every. Time.